James Houston, maker of “Let’s Talk About Sex,” interviewed groups of teenagers in America and in the Netherlands.

“What would you think of a girl that carries around a condom with her?”
America’s response: whore, promiscuous, slut, unclean, etc.
Netherlands’ response: nothing.

“What if a boy was carrying a condom around with him?”
America: He’s a player and he’s just trying to get some. Don’t talk to him.
Netherlands: If he didn’t have a condom, don’t talk to him. See ya. 

And look at the results. 
http://www.letstalkaboutsexthefilm.com/index.html  

It’s cool, bro. Ain’t no thang. 2 Techniques if you do feel you’re about to ejaculate before you even touch your partner though:

1. Squeeze Technique: Apply pressure (SOFT PRESSURE, DON’T KILL YOURSELF…) at the top or base of the penis for several seconds until you’re good to go. This is the most recommended technique.
2. Stop-Start Technique: Just stop penis stimulation until you’re good to go again. That doesn’t mean stop the hot lovin; perhaps put a little more time into your partner on your breaks.

Top 5 Fantasies for Men

1. Different sex positions
2. Aggressive sex partner
3. Getting oral sex
4. Sex with a new partner
5. Sex on the beach (say wha?!)

Masters and Johnson’s modeld: 4 Phases of sexual response

It was Kaplan who said sexual desire leads to excitement. 

Mangaia: Located in the South Pacific, has a very sexually open culture. The women are assertive and are not underrepresented like other countries. When a boy grows up, he is taught by older women how to please their future partners. For every one orgasm he has, the women in their culture have three orgasms. Sex is not so much of a taboo subject but something taught for both pleasure and procreation.

Inis Beag: An island just off of Ireland, is opposite in every way. Sex is not talked about unless it is within small groups of tight knit friends and family. Even then, it’s not talked about often. If a woman has an orgasm here, it’s seen as devil possession so she learns to control them. It’s her duty to please the man, not vise-versa. This culture is so conservative, the men and women never see each other naked; they have sex full clothed except for the genitals. And when the babies are “bathed”, they are just sponged down while wearing a cloth.

We were asked one question that lead to a debate throughout class: is America more like Inis Beag or Mangaia?

            When reading about theories, it had basically been a review for me except one in particular: Queer Theory. The queer theory is something I had not heard of before but I couldn’t agree more with. Part of the reason I could possibly agree with it is because it was developed in the 90’s and I’m a 90’s baby but the idea that we should eliminate categories that divide us: homosexuality, bisexuality, and heterosexuality. By separating ourselves into these specific categories, we develop some sort of competition and frustration with each other.

            In my opinion, it’s just as bad, if not worse, than when we were separated by “blacks” and “whites”. Even though, there is nothing different between us, with this labeled barrier, a group polarization takes over and we develop anger toward one another. It’s a pathetic thing to have a prejudice because someone is different than what “the norm” is.

            The Queer theory states that categories restrain us from finding love. I imagine it’s not just a love of companionship, which is also true since there are still men “in the closet”, but it restrains from developing love for humanity all together.

            To get the perspective of someone who has probably dealt with the prejudice of sexuality, I asked someone from high school what it’s like to be openly bisexual, Jane Chris. Jane first admitted that she was bisexual in 8^th grade but had known in the end of 7^th grade. She had always been closer with girls and “more comfortable physically”, for instance if there was a sleepover going on or a hang out with friends, she felt comfortable with a girl just laying on her. Very few times did Jane feel uncomfortable being open about her sexuality: when she told her best friends, one of them stopped talking to her for an extended amount of time, and also one boyfriend that made her feel guilty for hanging out with a girl she once kissed. Other than that, she just as comfortable as I would be to say that I’m heterosexual.

            I’ve known Jane for about five years and it intrigued me that she’s only had one girlfriend but multiple boyfriends. She says that most girls our age are bicurious, or curious about what it’d be like to have a mate that’s the same gender as them. Another reason is because she, like most girls (from what we’ve heard from mutual friends), like to be dominated in bed. Jane knows that if she were to date a girl, more often than not, she would be the one taking on the dominant role. However, when she is with a girl and engaging in intercourse, she says there is more passion because they have more emotion. Things such as more eye contact can make all the difference. Due to the fact that they have similar bodies makes it easier pleasure each other.

            The next question I asked is what she has to say to the people to are angry or violent to the homosexuals and bisexuals. Surprisingly enough, she has nothing to say to them. Jane called them ignorant and says that they need to learn more. The reason why people are so prejudice is because they are afraid of change. If anything, Jane is more frustrated about the situation, not angry at the people.

            She does bring up the fact that it is a two-way street though. It doesn’t really help the homosexual community when people flaunt off the fact that they’re gay or lesbian. Jane doesn’t approach it like that at all: “It’s a part of me…I don’t make a hug deal about it.” Flaunting sexuality only makes people uncomfortable and even more resentful toward change.

            My final question for Jane was what theory does she believe is most fitting for how people choose their sexuality. After I read them off, Jane leaned toward the cognitive, biological, and evolution theories. Cognitive because that’s what we think we’re attracted to. Biological because there could be a genetic pattern. And evolution because of the over population.

I’m currently in Psychology 180 and there’s just so much I want to talk about all the time.
An old friend of mine, I call him Ginger Matt, pointed out to me that I talk about sex A LOT though. I really don’t mean to. And I don’t want people thinking that I’m some sex crazed freak in my everyday life so this is where I will vent out all I have to say.

I’ll post what I learn, my viewpoints, essays I had to write for the class, etc.